Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
