ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
