Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
