I got chris browned last night
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Randomize
