The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize