I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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