It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
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