Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize
