All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
