69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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