Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
