hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
