Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Green mimosas i think yes
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
