After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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