you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
