hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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