I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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