I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
