..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize
