Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
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