I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
She's JV to your varsity
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
