I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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