I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
they need to just BURY HIM!
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
