i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
