and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
