My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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