Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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