You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize