i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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