So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
