and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
