have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
