we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
