I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
