at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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