When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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