Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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