Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
And then he peed in my hair
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