Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
