Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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