He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
