Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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