I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
