a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
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