I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
