I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
