I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
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