I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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