BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
