..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Randomize
