Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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